AMBITION VS PEACE in your Inner Middle East.

People My People,  

I was looking back on when’s the last time I wrote a blog post.  It was 2015 ya’ll! That’s how long I have neglected you.  My bad. But I have an EXCUSE!  Since then, as many of you know, I have quit my job to be an artist full time, had 3 dangerously handsome children, and continue to do work that tries to leave the world a little bit better than the way I found it.  So yeah…busy. 

What I have been thinking about lately is the idea of AMBITION VS PEACE.  It is a thin dental floss line separating the drive to go after all that seems unobtainable in front of you and the drive to enjoy and appreciate the things you have already accomplished around you.  Every ad we see on TV, on the internet is essentially saying, “You are alright…BUT you are not complete yet cause you don’t have THIS.”  I have always identified as a work in progress.  And I am.  But the question remains, if you are constantly in progress, will there ever come a time when you are simply enough for your own self worth, for your family, friends, and/or partner? Isn’t inner peace a way of saying…”Yeah, I’m good.  I eat, I’m dry, I’m clothed, I laugh…I’m good.” I certainly haven’t gotten there yet.  As I write this, 29.5% of my brain is trying to solve the problem of how I will get a PS5 tomorrow.   I suppose the answer is and has always been, we work towards the feeling that we are enough.  And that work has nothing to do with anything external you accomplish.  External accomplishments come from doing what you love at a level high enough that other people gain from what you produce, physically, spiritually or emotionally.  But you do it and get better at it, simply cause you LOVE doing it.  I take that back.  We are not working towards a feeling, they come and go, we are working towards a STATE OF BEING that we are enough.  The same way I know that I am Black, that I am a father, and there isn’t one thing a person can say that will change that, I have to KNOW that I am enough.  YOU have to know that you are ENOUGH.  Smart enough, pretty enough, strong enough, God enough. It’ll take me a while to get there.  I’ve watched too many commercials that say I’m not complete yet. But at least I know where my north star is.  I’ve been holding it within my chest my whole life. 

  

THIS WEEK’S CHALLENGE: 

I am going to straight jack a page from my new friend Jessica Care Moore’s playbook.  I want you to write a letter, poem, song, rap, essay, whatever giving thanks to a body part that has gotten you through a tough time.  Maybe it is your hands for writing a email or letter you’ve needed to send for a while now.  Maybe its your legs for having the strength to walk away.  You choose.  Hit me up on social media and share with me what you came up with.  Do that, and I promise it won’t take another 5 years for me to write back. 

  

WHAT’S GOING ON: 

Man, so many good things going on.  First and foremost, my virtual concert with some of my super friends BE ABOUT IT airs THIS SATURDAY.  It is FREE and is professionally shot.  If you love me at all you will attend this show! I will also be part of the La Jolla Playhouse’s WOW FESTIVAL for the 2nd time this year (My work can be found in WALKS OF LIFE and TOWARDS BELONGING)!  For TOWARDS BELONGING,  I am teaming up with MARAYA PERFORMING ARTS for a poetry/dance short film about Southeastern San Diego.  That will be dropping hopefully by end of November.  I produce and host an online show with The Old Globe called THE POET’S TREE happening every Tuesday.  In this interactive show I interview some of the the most world renowned poets in the world. You get to ask questions, play poetic games, and learn a lot about the craft of poetry and performance.  I am also working with NEW VILLAGE ARTS writing monologues about the lives of 2 of our most amazing elders in our community to be performed by professional actors.  It’s called SAVING STORIES.   That’s all for now. 

We will be taking our newly formed family of 5 on a road trip to Texas to see my parents.  That’s a 1month old, a 2 year old, a 4 year old, and a feisty, adorable, red-headed, latina…Pray for us!! 

  

Until Then, 

Be Now 

Gill Sotu

 

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